How to Build Self Confidence.

Posted: April 25th, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Our Cool School., Stop Bullies in Asheville! | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | No Comments »

Self Confidence is not something that a person of any age just happens to have by accident. It is cultivated over a period of time. 

The only way to obtain self confidence is to grow it, and the best way to do this is by getting really, really good at a particular skill. In so doing, the student becomes confident in his or her abilities- therefore gaining self esteem, or a sense of self worth.

I recommend a quality education in the Martial Arts as an excellent way to obtain self confidence.  Here’s why.  

1.  A built in system of challenging, but acheiveable goals.

The martial arts belt system builds self confidence by giving students of all ages a clear picture of where they are and where they are going.  There are specific criteria to get right, and specific lessons that have to be learned to an acceptable level.  Setting and reaching attainable goals is a huge part of building self confidence.

2.  The knowledge that you can hold your own in a fight.

You may remember Mr. Miyagi in the Karate Kid saying, “Miyagi hate fighting.”
Daniel: Yeah, but you like karate.
Miyagi: So?
Daniel: So, karate’s fighting. You train to fight.
Miyagi: That what you think?
Daniel: [pondering] No.
Miyagi: Then why train?
Daniel: [thinks] So I won’t have to fight.
Miyagi: [laughs] Miyagi have hope for you.

By training in the “fighting” aspects of martial arts you soon learn that it would be very challenging for somebody else to hurt you physically.  This builds self confidence.  Most of the time, the reason people get into fights in the first place is that they don’t know what they are capable of.  By learing Martial Arts you learn exactly what you are capable of and therefore have no need of fighting to find out where you stand. You no longer need to attempt to feel superior to somebody else to see the value of yourself.

3. An applied education in personal mental, physical, and spiritual growth and development.

Much more important than hitting things, Martial Arts are about personal growth and development.  Physically, Martial Arts are challenging but doable- meaning that it’s actually fun to do while you are getting in better shape.  Martial Arts require you to focus your mind and body at the same time- giving you powers of perception and awareness that you might not think possible.  Martial Arts become spiritual when you acheive the “No Mind” State.  This means that your mind and body are so well trained that they move in harmony while being spontanious and free.  Spiritual Martial Arts comes from focus, perseverance, mindfulness, and discipline.

4. An opportunity to contribute in a positive way to the local community.

When you are truly working to improve yourself, you cannot help but to be a positive influence on those around you.  Also, as Uncle Ben said in Spiderman, “with great power comes great responsibility.”  By learning the martial arts you build the power of self confidence with humility, self discipline with respect, and perseverance with a positive attitude. With these perspectives it is possible to not only acheive great things, but to do so in a way that is actually beneficial to society.

All of these things mean that you have built yourself through your own hard work into being somebody who is greater than your problems.  You will become somebody who is not bullied because you are no longer bulliable through your efforts.  You will become somebody who is able to deal with the stresses of life.  You will be somebody who appreciates and is appreciated by your family.  You will become somebody who is a positive influence on the world around you.

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